It was during the holiday season. The next Goal Setting meeting was just a few days away and I was on a high. After a rough couple of years, the stress of the recent hardships was finally beginning to lift. There was finally space between that ‘rough period’ and recent memory. The life I had been working so hard to build was almost realized.
Things were… on track. Finally.
This realization was followed immediately by two thoughts. The first was, “Enjoy it!” The second was, “Wow! What else can you do?”
As bold thoughts tend to, that question rattled around in the back of my mind for several days. Don’t get me wrong, it had room to stretch and a fresh bowl of water to drink from, but I was just scared to take it out for a walk.
Then, I committed to setting goals that test the boundaries between goal and dream. The kind that require the movement of at least a small mountain and cannot be accomplished alone.
They largely revolved around career and long-term life-planning and they all meant a lot to me. I even challenged the universe to make them happen, the way you dare your little brother to do something just to see what will happen. Then, I set forth on reprioritizing.
Something was missing, though. Sitting in my car, I pressed my hand to my chest as Josh Groban came through the car stereo. I don’t love everything he’s made and I am far too lazy to be a fan-girl of anything, not even music that tears my heart open on even the hardest days. Sitting there as the car filled with cold air, I thought, “I’d like to meet a man who makes me feel this way.”
Then, that challenging big sister inside me said, “If you love him so much, why don’t you marry him?”
The idea lit me up. Mostly, it made me laugh. How impractical! How ridiculous! People would think I’m crazy! Or desperate… Naturally, this lit me up even more.
I went inside and ran the idea by my grandma, the wet blanket. She smiled and began to giggle. Trust me, this woman does not giggle. Next, I tested the waters with a couple of brutally honest guy friends. They shrugged and asked, “Isn’t he gay?” I shrugged and said, “I don’t know, I’ve never met him.”
My best friend wrote me a lengthy email explaining that it was perfect because he embodies the kind of man that would be perfect for me. She knew more about him than I did. I shot back an email saying, “He’s just a guy…” This was, apparently, beside the point.
My girlfriends were all on board, too, especially the ladies from Goal Setting. They said, “Let me know what I can do to help!” and many wondered aloud, “Who do I know that might know him?”
Finally, I told someone even more stoic and pessimistic than my grandma: my closest guy friend. He breathed deeply leaned back and said, “Marry him? You don’t even know him!”
Jackpot. Onto the vision board he went.
Nine months later, I have not even so much as spoken to the guy. I decided to reprioritize my budget, cancelling the girl’s trip to Vegas to see his show.* I am not even sure I will go to his show in Phoenix, but I still have full faith in the original goal.
This experience has transformed my perspective on owning my heart and seeking support. I am rethinking his show on Friday because I’ve got conflicting opportunities for quality time with friends, pursuing passions that light me up just as much as Groban’s music. That and the parking will be a nightmare…
This whole thing even provided an opportunity to connect and laugh with my grandma, which is precious. We spent July 4th watching the holiday special on PBS just to see him sing. She was a little disappointed in the song choices but thought he performed well. Sorry, Josh, In-Laws are tough like that.
Note: She also told me I need to write a more lighthearted blog. “They can’t all be so deep, Shauna. People get tired of it.”
It also made very clear that the only obstacle between most people and the things they want is their willingness to vulnerably bare that passion. When you light up for a cause, other people will, too. It’s that simple. If they don’t have their own cause, helping you gives them something to get excited about, too.
As for Josh Groban? I still have four more months to make this big goal happen. If his public relations team is doing any social media monitoring, and enough people click on this, something cool could happen here. Or I could bump into him on a street corner. Or a mutual friend could introduce us. Or nothing could happen… ever.
I’m good either way.
Now tell me: What is your “Josh Groban”?
*Let’s face it, if I have to go all the way to Vegas to see him perform, he is probably just not that into me.